Courting My Muse

by Mary Crowell

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about

Courting My Muse (released 2007) is Mary Crowell's first solo album recorded with Greg Robert in the Vault.

Peter Alway discusses Courting My Muse:
Mary Crowell's (quadrivium's) "Courting My Muse" has overcome the special challenges of a solo recording, (I ranted about perils of piling on the accompaniment from guest musicians) because, for starters, she a damned fine pianist. Secondly, she's got a couple of bands to draw from: Play it with Moxie, the Gafilk house band; and Three Weird Sisters.

I'm guessing that doctorate in music is coming into play here, as well.

This is about the jazziest filk CD I've heard, but it's not all Jazz.

Mary's Pegasus-nominated "Legolas" is there, which is a lot of fun.

But my favorites are: Some Believe: Just the coolest mummy song you'll ever hear. Cool mysterious Middle Eastern sound (harmonic minor?) and special recording effects that work well. This song gave me shivers up my spine while I was typing a few paragraphs back. Remind me to enter this in the Pegasus brainstorming poll.

Get Down Mama: Inspired by her son Simon's surreal observations, the music is at least as cool as the imagery. I'd enjoyed it in concert, and it really shines on this recording. The creaky percussion really adds to it, especially when you realize that narrator isn't human.

Two Hours Away: A very sweet song, the folkiest thing I've heard from Mary, I am reminded of Tom Lehrer describing the piano as an 88-string guitar. As good a performance of a ballad as I've heard on any recording, filk or mainstream.

Doctrine of Ethos: A fun music geeking song. Especially as a dulcimer player with a minor in math. Dulcimers use modes more than most musicians who play more chromatic instruments, so the mode stuff is cool.

The production values are top notch, Mary's voice is great, her piano skills are famous in the filk world, and the songs range from good to phenomenal. The only thing wrong with this CD is that I've heard Mary's more recent songs--they are even better!

credits

released May 7, 2007

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about

Mary Crowell Athens, Alabama

Mary Crowell is a singer/songwriter and piano teacher who loves mythology and playing Dungeons & Dragons.
She may be seen at science fiction and filk conventions performing and accompanying concerts on piano and occasionally clarinet.
Scattering Seeds on the Pomegranate Tour is her third solo album and is a mythic musical journey!
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Track Name: Summertime Beagle
Summertime Beagle
© 2003 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
Layin’ around like a summertime beagle,
I don’t wanna move! 'Got my legs stretched out in the sun.
Others can buzz about like bees in the clover.
I’ll yawn a bit, and maybe I’ll turn over.
Nappin’ in a hammock with my man is much more fun.

INTERLUDE
‘Gotta go in, but I wanna stay --
Nap here with you on a lazy day.
I’m an ol’ hound in the September heat,
List’ning to the slow slow sound of your heart beat.

VERSE
Let’s let sleeping dogs lie in the sunshine together.
The air is hot and sultry, but the leaves are fallin’ down.
There’s grapes on the vine; the basil is blooming.
Honey suckle’s gone, and I am assuming
Snowy winter days and nights will soon be comin’ ‘round.

INTERLUDE VERSE
‘Sayin’ farewell to the dog days of summer,
Rolling up my hammock, and it’s time to say goodbye.
You stop and pick up a small yellow flower,
Give it to me and say, “Stay another hour.”
I stay another three, and boy, time does surely fly.

VERSE
Layin’ around like a summertime beagle,
I don’t wanna move! 'Got my legs stretched out in the sun.
Others can buzz about like bees in the clover.
I’ll yawn a bit, and maybe I’ll turn over.
Nappin’ in a hammock with my man is much more fun.

Nappin’ in a hammock with my man is much more fun.
Nappin’ in a hammock with my baby is much more fun.
Layin’ around like a summertime beagle
Track Name: Galatea (and Pygmalion)
Galatea (and Pygmalion)
© 2003 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
I want your slow hands
On my body, want an artist’s touch.
I don’t get out that much.
My heart’s like stone.

VERSE
My chisled profile --
It isn’t finished. ‘Wants some smoothing out.
I cannot speak or shout,
I’m all alone.

CHORUS
You’ve left me under the sheets again.
You’re on your knees in someone’s sacred den.
You’ll give her flowers and all of your prayers.
Then you’ll come back to me and say that you care.

VERSE
I’ve lost my marbles.
They’re with the pebbles on your littered floor.
If you come through that door
Then that’s okay.

VERSE
My arms enfold you,
But I can’t hold you very close to me.
This pedestal, you see,
Keeps you away.

CHORUS

VERSE
Hey Aphrodite --
So fine and mighty, Give me back my man,
That fool Pygmalion
Make flesh my heart.

VERSE
His ‘Sleeping Lovely’ --
I’ll look just like you if he’ll finish me
Bring me to life to be
His work of art,

Bring me to life to be
His work of art.
Bring me to life to be
YOUR work of art.
Track Name: Good Man Go Bad
Good Man Go Bad
© 2001 by Mary Crowell.

INTRODUCTION
When you're watching movies,
Relaxing with a book,
You admire the hero,
And you revile the crook.
The hero always wins
Unless he's interrupted
By a little wicked someone
Who helps him get corrupted.

VERSE
It's a fine thing to cheer and applaud them.
They're upholding the good way -- be glad!
But I find that the view is much better,
When I get to see a good man go bad.

CHORUS
It seems heroes get tempted but rarely do fall.
That's nice for the damsel but no fun at all
For the women whose jobs are to lead men astray
Circe, Delilah, Morgan Le Fey.

VERSE
Circe tried but got left on her island.
"Dear, I miss my wife, my dog, and my lad."
Delilah failed when she cut Samson's tresses.
He weakened but the good plan went bad.

VERSE
A tête a tête with Le Fey caused a problem,
'Cause it seems they were related just a tad.
Arthur tried to find a final solution,
And that's where a really good man went bad.

INTERLUDE
It's more entertaining
To organize a coupe to
Overthrow a good man
Than a blackguard through and through.
Think of the suffering,
Justifications.
Those who knew him
Never knew what he could do.

VERSE
He'll dress in black and grow wicked with power.
He might be angry, or gothic, or sad.
His cruelty grows, causing henchmen to cower.
No one is evil like a good man gone bad.

CHORUS
Some fall for power or vices more base.
Others for love -- that's a hard one to trace.
The hero's corruption leads many to death.
Just ask the husband of Lady MacBeth.

VERSE
MacBeth was known for his honor and prowess,
But ambition crowned him king and a cad.
Some blame his wife, or maybe three little witches
Helped to make MacBeth a good man gone bad.

VERSE
If he fancies a job as a hero,
I should think that he's probably mad.
Temptation calls him to go to the dark side.
It's not too hard to make a good man go bad.

CHORUS
Although heroes are known to occasionally fall.
They often do rally -- that's no fun at all
For the women whose jobs are to lead men astray
Circe, Delilah, Morgan Le Fey.

VERSE
It's a fine thing to cheer and applaud them.
They're upholding the good way -- be glad!
But I find that the view is much better,
When I get to see a good man go bad.
Track Name: Magnus Retail
Magnus Retail
© 2001 by Mary Crowell.

INTRODUCTION
Sometimes a wizard's bag of tricks
Needs a little help, a real quick fix.
If that's the case, you know what to do.
Call me, Magnus retail, for the spells that cast true.

CHORUS
Your spell won't cast?
I'll make another.
Glamour won't last?
Don't call your mother;
I'm the genuine article, an alchemist, and genius squared.

You need sigils and signs?
Pay me money.
Words to combine
That don't sound funny?

Thesaurus, procurer, businessman and genius squared.

VERSE
You say that you were walking along,
When you tripped and fell and broke your wand.
Don't throw away your ailing stick.
I'll fix it, paint it, polish it slick.

CHORUS
Scrying to do?
I can find it.
An enchantment or two?
I've refined it.
Clandestine, done with utmost discretion by a genius squared.

You want a carpet to fly?
I can deliver.
A mermaid's left eye?
Shipped down the river.
I specialize in merchandise of magic; I'm a genius squared.

VERSE
I've got amulets made of silver and gold;
Rings from queens a millenia old.
Wreak flaming death! Cause misery!
There's just a small nonnegotiable fee.

CHORUS
Life’s a little less grim
When it’s enchanted.
An impossible whim
Can be granted.
Cross my palm with lot's of gold, and it is SOLD by a genius squared.

There’s someone you fear.
Need a favor?
Should he disappear?
I’ll be you savior
As long as payment’s in advance as I demand, a genius squared.

VERSE
There's a witch whose looks are giving you trouble.
Sabatra's her name with a boil and bubble.
She's a cousin of mine, and I'm sure you can see
Why I double my fee when it's close family.

CHORUS
(Spoken: Sooooooooo, you tell me . . .)
Your spell won't cast?
I'll make another.
Glamour won't last?
Don't call your mother.
I'm the genuine article, an alchemist and genius squared.

So, come on down!
Magic wholesale!
Best deals in town!
Magnus Retail!
I'm the genuine article, an alchemist and genius squared!
Track Name: Don't Leave Us Hanging
Don't Leave Us Hanging
© 2001 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
We're following a trail of your device
Relying on riddles and throws of the dice,
Wisdom our treasure and rubies our gain.
Your words have helped us, and yet they're our bane.

VERSE
One could have warned us, but we didn't hear.
He couldn't listen; we were blinded by fear.
Wisdom comes slowly, and that is a shame.
Your crystal warnings are never the same.

CHORUS
Don't leave us hanging
In the place where the souls are bound.
I'm petrified of your opinions,
And the questions all around.

VERSE
Your letters provide us with choices to make.
I'm looking at options. Which one do we take?
Flashes of insight appear in the eyes.
Will we choose right, or will we choose wise?

VERSE
You and your puzzles, they put songs in my head.
I'll dance to your tune. I'm so easily led.
Music's the answer; the question you pose.
But you ask another, and so our quest goes.

CHORUS X3
Track Name: Some Believe
Some Believe
© 2003 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
Some believe you always die,
Age a force you can’t defy.
I do.
I shall all the gods surpass!
Hide my heart inside a glass
Imbued
With magic sand that never falls
Frozen in translucent walls.
Powder soft, gives such delight,
My life
Hides in a drift of white.

VERSE
They’re pouring wine upon my skin.
'Slender thread of patience thins
Grows taut.
Will they ever leave this place?
Linen wraps around my face.
I’m caught.
Gravity, it rules us all.
Still, I sought to slow the fall.
Sand in grasping fingers sifts,
My world,
Forever lost in drifts.

INTERLUDE
Wretched thief, who took the box!
'Hid the key.
My heart is locked.
Now, I’m cursed to never die,
Trapped within a rotting lie.
Then they moved me from my tomb
To a land of rain and gloom.

VERSE
Pity he who bares my skin,
Feasts his eyes upon my grin
So wide.
Find my frozen work of art
Shatter it, and break the heart
Inside!
Magic sand that never falls
Frozen in translucent walls.
Powder soft, gave such delight,
My hope
Hides in a drift of white.

INTERLUDE
Hidden high upon a shelf
Rests the glass that holds my Self.
I am cursed to ever live;
They cannot my pride forgive.
My things are with me to remind
Of sunny homelands left behind.

VERSE
Some believe my bird has flown,
Left me here with all I own
Denied
Weigh my heart against a feather,
Dark and heavy like the weather
Outside.
Rain will melt right through this mesh,
All that guards my rotting flesh,
Wrapped up tight against the chill,
My chest,
An empty hole to fill.
Track Name: Captain of the Guard
Captain of the Guard
© 2001 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
I said to my son “Now, honey, tell me,
When you grow up, what will you be?”
He said, “Mother, dear, it’s your greatest fear.
I’m gonna be the King’s best friend.”

“Every day since I was a tot,
I wanted to be Sir Lancelot.
Oh! What a life! He’s got a beautiful wife.
I wanna be the King’s best friend.”

CHORUS
“‘Cause the captain of the guard gets all of the gals,
Stays up late having drinks with his pals.
There’s a short life span for the King’s best man,
But while I live I’ll be the captain of the guard.”

VERSE
I said to my son, “Now, tell me sweet,
Is there some other way that your family can eat?”
“Can’t think of one that is half as much fun
I’d like to be the King’s best friend.”

“Life’s too short, and it’s not fair,
but the captain of the guard gets more than his share.
He’s the best sword of his wandering lord.
It’s good to be the King’s best friend.”

CHORUS
“‘Cause the captain of the guard lives a beautiful dream.
Most get the dregs while he’s skimming the Cream.
There’s a short life span for the King’s best man,
But while I live I’ll be the captain of the guard.”

VERSE
I said to my son, “Now what of intrigue?
You’re a sharp man, but you’re not in the league
of the Grand Vizier.” “Now Mother, see here!
I’m gonna be the king’s best friend.”

“In a world that’s rife with strife
the King will trust in me with his life.
He’ll never believe that I’m the type to deceive.
I can’t. I’m the King’s best friend.

CHORUS
“‘Cause the captain of the guard can never be bought.
That weakness for the ladies is a trifling fault.
There’s a short life span for the King’s best man,
But while I live I’ll be the captain of the guard.”

VERSE
I said to my son, “Love, don’t be a tool
For those who’d use your vice to play the King for a fool.”
He said, “Mother, I’ll try, but I’m not gonna lie.
I’m s’posed to be the King’s best friend.”

“I can’t fight that siren’s song,
But my love for her cannot be wrong
My liege may lock me away; my love I’ll never betray
It’s hard to be the King’s best friend.”

CHORUS
“‘Cause the captain of the guard is a sensual soul
But defending Truth and Honor is his primary goal.
There’s a short life span for the King’s best man,
But while I live I’ll be the captain of the guard.”

VERSE
I said to my son, “There’s Evil to hound.
There’s Card’nal Richlieus scheming and Iagos abound.”
He said, “Mother, I’ know, and to fight them I go.
I need to be the King’s best friend.”

“Swords will cross, and I may die.
When I do the ladies will cry.
And on that dark day, I know just what they’ll say,
They’ll say he was the King’s best friend.”

CHORUS
“Cause the captain of the guard is an honorable knight.
Even when wrong, he’ll do the thing that is right.
There’s a short life span for the King’s best man,
But while I live I’ll be the captain of the guard.”
Track Name: When I Grow Up (The Jessica Rabbit Song)
When I Grow Up (The Jessica Rabbit Song)
© 2001 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
When I grow up
I wanna be
The girl in a sequined gown
With a bunny rabbit married to me.

VERSE
I know you think
I’m just a loon,
But she’s got great sex appeal --
That hair, those gams, that toon.

CHORUS
She’s not bad; they just draw her that way
Posing and pouting her lips.
She’s peeking out from under her Veronica Lake,
Gloved hands resting on hips.

VERSE
She loves her spouse,
Her bunny half.
He loves her a thousand ways,
But his favorite one is making her laugh.

VERSE
She’ll use rough means
To save her man.
When he heads into danger,
She whacks him in the brain with a pan.

CHORUS

VERSE
The private Dick
Thought she was vile,
But 'though he caught her playing patty cake
He couldn’t help but admire her style.

VERSE
Her heart is gold
(Looks like a jade.)
Even then if you asked around,
Roger Rabbit has got it made.

CHORUS

VERSE
When I grow up
I wanna be
The girl in a sequined gown
With a bunny rabbit married to me.
Track Name: Change of the Season
Change of the Season
© 2002 by Mary Crowell.

VERSE
The air is chilling, and my thoughts are reeling.
They consume me.
'Don’t know the reason this change of the season
makes me gloomy.
Try as I may,
It’s not June.

CHORUS
Dreaming of spring I can almost taste
Pomegranate, peppermint.
But then I wake, and I hear the wind
Moaning and lonely for her.

VERSE
She’s got to go now to answer an old vow.
She is dying.
As I walk past her, the leaves falling faster,
She is crying.
Try as she may,
It’s not June.

CHORUS

VERSE
Your mother’s weeping. The dark earth is sleeping
While I shiver.
Do not despair, Dear, the seeds in his lair near
By the river.
Try as you may,
Try as you may,
It’s not June.
Track Name: Get Down Mama
Get Down Mama
© 2003 by Mary Crowell

VERSE
Get down, Mama. Sleep your dark eyes down.
The scarecrow’s a’comin’ and he ain’t no clown.
Cloak yourself in midnight; duck your head ‘neath your wing.
‘Crazy things we’re hearing are not meant to be seen.

Ah ah hah hah! Uh huh!
Uuuh Huh! Uh huh!

CHORUS
Dead trees’ bones on the hills
Wave at the tall rows of corn.
North wind howls and it chills,
Singing to the old things we mourn.
Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay!

VERSE
Get down, Mama. Dream a new sort of dream --
One with shiny metal, one that glitters and gleams.
Scarecrow man is coming; he’s just clothing and sticks.
‘Come to get his payment. See which one that he picks.

Ah ah hah hah! Uh huh!
Uuuh Huh! Uh huh!

CHORUS
Dead trees’ bones in the shadows writhe,
Wave at the long rows of corn.
Reaps the man, with his low-slashing scythe.
Soon the summer plantings are shorn.
Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay!

INTERLUDE
Get down, Mama.
Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay! Ah ha ha ha!
Get down, Mama.
Yay, yay, yay, yay, yay! Ah ha ha ha!

VERSE
Get down, Mama. Croak your Gathering Caw.
‘Plenty food for eating if you saw what you saw.
Scarecrow man is done now; he is gone for the night.
We’ll feast here in the harvest ‘til the dawn of the light.

Ah ah hah hah! Uh huh!
Uuuh Huh! Uh huh!

CHORUS
Dead trees’ bones are our feast hall.
We’ll eat the remains in the corn.
The air is black, and it’s loud with our calls,
Singing to the old ones we mourn.

Get down Mama. Sleep your dark eyes down.
Scarecrow’s a’comin’ and he ain’t no clown.
Track Name: Two Hours Away
Two Hours Away
© 2003 by Mary Crowell.

Two hours away,
The world’s a wing and a cotton Christmas display.
Sun glints into my eyes, its light, a triangle warm
On my pen and arm.

CHORUS
I’m flying home
Where you wait for me,
Flying home
Notebook on my knee.

Songs were sitting at home.
They stayed inside while they waited for me to roam.
Then I captured the sun on a wing in Canada skies.
Then those songs could rise.

Songbooks stacked up alone;
Piano’s near, but the room is silent of tone.
I love coming home, and yet why does going away
Tell me things are left to say?

CHORUS

I’m missing you, Love,
Suspended here in the clouds of Heaven above.
When I’m writing these words, and while I’m singing this song,
‘Journey seems so long. But I’m

CHORUS

Two hours away,
The world’s a wing and a cotton Christmas display.
Now I’m coming home on a wing in Canada’s skies.
Now my notes can rise!

CHORUS

And I come to Alabama with a notebook on my knee.
Track Name: Doctrine of Ethos
Doctrine of Ethos
© 2002 by Mary Crowell.

INTRODUCTION
Music was considered divine.
Pythagoras, he showed us how with twine,
Or string, Whatever. The ratios are the thing
That makes perfection. Organized sound has a predilection
For controlling the universe!

VERSE
There used to be magic in songs that were played.
The music got inside your head, and there it stayed.
The Doctrine of Ethos said music’s a force,
A microcosm of creation at its source.

CHORUS
It’s mathematics,the ultimate code!
And the universe was singing in my favorite mode.
You had to listen. The sound made you whole.
Any shape the player wanted, he could twist in your soul.

VERSE
The music of ancients used several modes.
Through dorian and phrygian the power flowed.
The music played hot, and the music played cold.
The legends say, that in its day, it rocked and rolled.

CHORUS

INTERLUDE
You want ‘em calm as you demand in the palm of your hand?
Dorian’s the mode you want, Brother!
Forgetting right from wrong so exciting is your song?
Phrygian’s the mode that fires ‘em like no other.

VERSE
Some say that it’s evil. It makes the mind weak.
But ethos is the magic that musicians seek.
They say that it’s lost now. They say that it’s gone.
But those that play the day away will prove ‘em wrong!

CHORUS

VERSE
Philosophers spoke of the music of spheres,
and politicians limited what one could hear.
Upon much reflection, I have to conclude
There’s those who would prefer the power more subdued.

CHORUS

INTERLUDE
I hope you understand that the music’s in command.
You’re the one awaiting its pleasure.
And he who this denies is most certainly unwise.
His muse is false. There’s no one waltzing to his measure.

VERSE
There’ll always be magic in songs that are played.
The music gets inside your head, and there it stays.
The Doctrine of Ethos says music’s a force,
A microcosm of creation at its source.

CHORUS (VARIATION)
It’s mathematics,the ultimate code!
And the universe is singing in my favorite mode.
You have to listen. The sound makes you whole.
Any shape the player wants to, he can twist in your soul.

CHORUS (VARIATION)
Any shape the player wants to, he can twist in your soul.
Track Name: Ravens
Ravens
© 2001 by Mary Crowell

VERSE
Black wings beat. They’re near the glass of my window.
Shattered sound jars something in my mind.
As I watch them flying high and low,
Playing games with others of their kind.

CHORUS
Ravens,
Adorning their wings with shards of night.
Ravens,
Travelling farther in their flight.

VERSE
Pictures tumble down like rocks and boulders,
Magic messages which cloud my mind.
Thought and mem’ry sit upon my shoulders,
See what’s seen by others of their kind.

CHORUS
Ravens,
Searching for secrets in the night.
Ravens,
Gathering wisdom in their flight.

VERSE
Beats his wings. And now we have a shoreline.
So it’s said in the collective mind.
Making worlds, he is a bird divine,
Bringing water to the human kind.

CHORUS
Raven,
Gathering people in the night.
Raven,
Yes, it is he who sets things right.

VERSE
Black wings beat. They’re near the glass of my window.
Shattered sound jars something in my mind.
As I watch them flying high and low,
Playing games with others of their kind.
Track Name: Bad Man Go Good
Bad Man Go Good
© 2001 by Karen Murphy and Mary Crowell.

VERSE
I've watched a lot of good men go -- bad.
And damn it, now it's making me mad.
I do not see the attraction Or the kind of satisfaction
(They find) promised in the pleasures so easily had.

VERSE
My honor halos around me -- like a cloak,
My name is one the good guys will invoke.
But although I can stand tall, And am known in every hall,
She's the one with whom he'd rather he woke.

CHORUS
(He's) living it up with some tart in a tower,
Giving it all to some witch with dagged sleeves.
Figure it out! She wants money and power.
"It must be my charm!" this moron believes.

VERSE
She ruins lives and plots ill -- with the best,
As many of her victims can attest,
Yet though her evil's known -- Hell, it must be her cologne,
Our captain’s latest letter says that he is her guest.

VERSE

He was just supposed to capture her tower and fort.
Now his message says, "I'm pleased to report,
“That she's truly a sweet jade, And I've really got it made.
Can I count on you to give us your unflagging support?"
[Spoken] ‘Cause He’s BUSY! Doing What?

CHORUS

VERSE
I could tell him he's the third one she’s bested this year
Or suggest he might have something to fear.
But he's like all the rest, He'd just think that I'm a pest
For warning words of wisdom will fall on deaf ears.

VERSE
But I'm tired of this game played out -- as she would.
I think it's time I do what's said I should.
I’ll find one of her men, And bring him back to Right again;
I've longed to make a bad man -- go good.
[Spoken] We’ll just turn the tables a bit. Hmmmmm? He’ll be . . .

CHORUS
Giving it all to me here in my tower, Giving it all, his soul to retrieve.
I'll turn him to good. Just give me an hour.
I have it within me to make him believe.

VERSE
Or perhaps I should devise a novel plan
That doesn't risk the soul of any -- man.
If I give my own attention To her feminine dimension,
Make a bad woman go good, Oh -- I can.

CHORUS
(She’ll be) Giving it all to me here in my tower,
Giving it all, her soul to retrieve.
I'll turn her to good. Just give me an hour.
I have it within me to make her believe.
Track Name: Legolas
Legolas
© 2002 by Mary Crowell.

I like to watch him on the silver screen.
‘Built like I like ‘em, he is long and lean.
Yes, he is, And I am his.
‘Gotta thing for an elf, can’t help myself,
O Legolas!

He’s not a talker, likes to use his bow
To good advantage on his orcish foe.
Yes he does,
And I’m in lust.
I just love pointy-ears, don’t care who hears me,
Legolas!

INTERLUDE
The Ring is s’posed to find ‘em
And in the darkness bind ‘em.
I don’t wanna lie to you.
There’s just one precious thing
that is needing a fling.
It’s Legolas!

I’m just a’ sittin’ here all by myself.
I’m thinking naughty thoughts about this elf.
Yes, I am.
‘Don’t give a damn!
Gotta thing for this shy, tall, elven guy,
O Legolas!

There’s those who argue ‘bout the movie’s plot.
Because of time, the film left out a lot.
Bombadill
is not my thrill.
I’ll just sit here and stare at his long blond hair,
O Legolas!

INTERLUDE
This girl I know likes Strider,
And no. I won’t deride her.
But she can have her Aragorn.
The return of the king, won’t inspire me to sing
Like Legolas!

I like to watch him on the silver screen.
‘Built like I like ‘em, he is long and lean.
Yes, he is,
And I am his.
‘Gotta thing for an elf, can’t help myself,
O Legolas!