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What's the DM Gonna Do?

from I Have Missed You at My Table by Mary Crowell

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    This is a physical CD. This physical CD comes in a lovely six panel wallet and glossy finish. (There is no cellophane wrap however, in the hopes of adding a little less to the landfills.)

    Mary Crowell has returned to Mystic Fig studio to work with Jeff and Maya Bohnhoff. I Have Missed You at My Table is her fourth solo album and is a second jazzy love letter to gaming. Consider it the heir to Crowell's 2012 release, Acolytes of the Machine & Other Gaming Stories.

    releases May 27, 2022

    General Album Credits:
    Produced, engineered and mixed by Jeff Bohnhoff at Mystic Fig Studio
    Arrangements by Mary Crowell and Jeff Bohnhoff
    Mastered by Justin Weis at Trakworx
    Album art by Starr Weems
    Album Layout by Misty Granade

    All songs written by Mary Crowell except the following:
    “Evil Dice Tango” (lyrics by Ian Badcoe and Mary Crowell; music by Mary Crowell)
    “The Xbox Makes You Antisocial” (lyrics by Lilium Crowell and Mary Crowell; music by Mary Crowell)

    Back up vocals by Maya Bohnhoff on "What's the DM Gonna Do, When I. was a Little Rat (Full Company,) Evil Dice Tango, Hat of Disguise, and When I. was a Little Rat (Vincent and Temple,)

    Back up vocals by Amanda Bohnhoff on "Evil Dice Tango"

    Violin/Fiddle by Amy McNally on "Hat of Disguise" and "Why I Was Late (the Pony Song)"

    Cello by Betsy Tinney on "The Tiniest Bit of the Powder"

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    Includes unlimited streaming of I Have Missed You at My Table via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.     ... more
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  • Full Digital Discography

    11
    releases

    Get all 11 Mary Crowell releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Mary Crowell's Patreon: Year Six, Mary Crowell's Patreon: Year Five, I Have Missed You at My Table, Mary Crowell's Patreon: Year Four, Mary Crowell's Patreon: Year Three, Mary Crowell's Patreon: Year Two, Mary Crowell's Patreon: Year One, Scattering Seeds on the Pomegranate Tour, and 3 more. , and , .

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about

The Dungeon Master worked really hard on preparing the game only to find out half the players have canceled. How’s that going to work out for them?

lyrics

What’s the DM Gonna Do?
(Copyright 2019 by Mary C Crowell)

What’s the DM gonna do when half the players show?
“Sure I guess it’s fine,” they say. But if you really want to know.
It’s gonna need a rewrite or the players here will die.
I stayed up all night to make this game right
And here’s the thing: I’m gonna try.
I’m gonna try. I’m gonna try.

I’ll have some coffee—then I’ll drink more of the same.
The mighty bitey bean—-will save my game.
It may be black or maybe with cream
I’ll need to change the sorcerer’s dream.
The cleric has the flu today—the halfling’s gone away.

What’s the DM gonna do when half the players show?
“Sure I guess it’s fine,” they say. But if you really want to know.
It’s gonna need a rewrite or the players here will die.
I stayed up all night to make this game right
And here’s the thing: I’m gonna try.
I’m gonna try. I’m gonna try.

I’ll have some coffee—then I’ll know just what to do
The mighty bitey bean is adventure’s bestest brew
I’d drink it cold though then it tastes vile
We replaced the druid and her strong crocodile
With this tame NPC that I just named Lyle.
When did planning games become such a trial?
The no-show rogue has all their cash. My plot line’s in the trash.

What’s the DM gonna do when half the players show?
“Sure I guess it’s fine,” they say. But if you really want to know.
It’s gonna need a rewrite or the players here will die.
I stayed up all night to make this game right
And here’s the thing: I’m gonna try.
I’m gonna try. I’m gonna try.

I’ll have some coffee—then I’ll drink and drink some more.
The mighty bitey bean will remind me what the dice are for.
The fighter will be fighting a duel.
The bard can heal, so I will be cruel.
The mage can Skype our session from school.
She’s my kid so that might make it cool.
The ranger has a thing at eight—it’s probably a date.

What’s the DM gonna do when half the players show?
“Sure I guess it’s fine,” they say. But if you really want to know.
It’s gonna need a rewrite or the players here will die.
It’s gonna need a rewrite or the players here will die.
It’s gonna need a rewrite or the players here will die.
I stayed up all night to make this game right.
And here’s the thing: They’re gonna die!

credits

from I Have Missed You at My Table, released May 27, 2022
Mary Crowell- Lead and backing vocals, keyboards, drum programming
Jeff Bohnhoff- Guitar, bass, drum programming
Maya Bohnhoff- backing vocals

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about

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Mary Crowell Athens, Alabama

Mary Crowell is a singer/songwriter and piano teacher who loves mythology and playing Dungeons & Dragons.
Her Patreon is here: www.patreon.com/DrMaryCCrowell
She may be seen at science fiction and filk conventions performing and accompanying concerts on piano and occasionally clarinet.
Scattering Seeds on the Pomegranate Tour is her third solo album and is a mythic musical journey! ... more

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